Lost a friend.
Still have hole in heart.
Hear my dad yelling on the phone at his ex-girlfriend.
This is wonderful ladeez and gentlemen.
I have art to show but it's at school.
I'll scan it when I get it back.
Okay, bye.


Edit:
Okay. Quick thought.

Definition for sane:

sane - Show Spelled Pronunciation[seyn] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective, san‧er, san‧est.
1.
free from mental derangement; having a sound, healthy mind: a sane person.
2.
having or showing reason, sound judgment, or good sense: sane advice.
3.
sound; healthy.

Based on the second definition, being sane depends on how you show your reason. You may think to kill someone, but reason that it's not good and you don't do it. By showing reason you do nothing. You deny your impulses. If denying your impulses is being 'sane' then what the hell. I guess for the most part I am insane. But lately I have been denying them and now it is all bottled up. Does this make me sane or insane? It's physically hurting. Face the consequences of life or face a bit of pain? The insane decision would be face the consequences of life, the sane would be to grin and bear it. Which is the better one?
Being happy and insane, or miserable and sane? OR I could be sad and insane but I would also be able to get over it like a trooper, because I seem to be really good at that.
I wish I could speak to him some more. He's RIGHT FUCKING THERE and I can't do anything about it. Why? Because I'm especially sane right now.


Fuck. By the way, spiders are quite literally taking over my house. They're using the trees and my house to make their spidey webs. I'm pretty sure I'm depressed right now, and I apologize to you all for these lame entries. And lack of art. But you all have to understand that in public I don't act this way at all. This is my only outlet. I'm like a bubble sun rays and hope at school. When I'm all alone at home, which seems to be all the fucking time, is when I do most of my moping. I need friends over to keep me distracted. But no one has time. Shit. I don't think that this is healthy. It feels very much like cheap wine or brandy. It burns like that.
Erm.
You should probably kick me in the face and say, "Get the fuck over it. Don't be emo."
And I'll be like, "GOLLY GEE DARN, SIR. WHUT IN TARNATION WAS I THINKING."
And then I'll go back being happy and art oriented. And on my way to join the nunnery. Any boy who seems interested in me I turn down. And I will have no need for boys if it's always going to be like this.

P.s. My dad asked me if I was a lesbian once because I still don't have a boyfriend. IS THIS MY FATE? I hope not.

SPIDERS SPIDERS SPIDERS.