It's been a while since I last updated.

Soooooo. I've been very very busy. Stephanie moved out and so I'm alone until the 1st, keeping busy with working 4-5 days a week and also doing an internship with C.hristine L.arsen. I don't want to type out her actual name in case if this blog comes up in a search. Precautions to keep on the d.l.

Beyond that, I've been watching a shit load of Lost, which has been amazing, and ignoring all the men pursuing me, which I think I've needed to do for a while. 2 were actively doing so, but I think they finally caught the hint that I'm really not digging it. Nice guys.
I just can't do it though. It doesn't feel correct.
That and I'm still hung up kind of over the last one.
I need to find a Desmond double equivalent to my age. Out there, that man, is my soul mate fer sher.


Gee I just don't know what I'm doing anymore. I guess hearts aren't so important.

I just want to exercise for half a day and then sit and focus on imaginations beyond me.


Oh, yes. And the nightmares roll on. Visions of skins dappled with chemical burns and lesions, almost demonic, and the usual discomfort of some kind of dying thing or sexual hideousness. I can't keep track of the recent ones, they are all just abstract flashes, images that make me squirm and believe in some kind of devil. I don't know why I have these all of the time. Some kind of deep seated anxiety. They're highly dimensional though. I don't understand.