Scooby Dooby Doo

All of this started when I came to school wearing my dork glasses. Tom said I looked like Velma.
And then I said, "Ever notice Shaggy has always got the munchies?"
And Tom replied, "Yeah, that's because they all smoke pot all the time. DUH."
"Not uh. Velma's too much of a dork to smoke pot." I say this in a way to mean that I don't think only 'cool' kids smoke pot (because that'd be ridiculous), but Velma seems more like a play-by-the-rules kind of gal.
"Dorks smoke pot. Dorks smoke a lot of pot."
Oh, touche Tomaggio.
Then we talked some more about the Scooby Doo gang and their roles.
"Shaggy's the pothead. So is Scooby. Daphne's the little whore." Started Tom.
"Fred's like the Jock." I added.
"But he's like the Jock who stoops down and hangs out with all of the dorks."
"Dude, have you ever noticed that Velma never gets any of the guys? She's like the fat nerdy one."
"It's not that. She's just a lesbian."
"Nooooo she's nooootttt a lesbian. She's just going to be a nun or something."
"Nope. She's a lesbian. Who's a nerd and is fat."
"Tom."
"What."
"By calling me Velma, are you saying that I am a dorky fat lesbian?"
"Nooo, I'm not saying that!"
"I THINK THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE SAYING."
And then we went into French and I drew this lovely piece of art depicting the Scooby Doo gang, with the guest appearance of Paris Hilton. I'm actually proud of how she came out because I had absolutely no photo references. Arielle gave me a push on what she looked like (like the hair and eye shape), but I did the rest. She came from my head. Yay.
And then later on I was talking to this other kid about it and he told me that twice Velma had gotten a guy, but one of them turned out to be the villain.
Daaaaaamn Velma. Get some doods.